THE ACT OF FORGIVENESS
Many years ago, someone hurt me deeply. For many years, I lived with that pain in my heart. Everyday, I reminded myself that I was never going to forgive – ever! Then, a moment came when I asked myself, “does this person even know that I was – and is still feeling – hurt?” and “if I forgive this person, what would I lose?”
You can’t imagine how free and how relieved I became when I decided to truly forgive.
There is a certain feeling we all get when we see, or even think about, that person whom we promised ourselves not to forgive: a sharp chest pain; a migraine; a heartbeat louder than Dr. Dre’s beat box; and sometimes, a nauseous feeling due to a sudden rush of blood through our veins.
We carry that hatred, bear that grudge, and live with that pain, not aware of the greater harm such burden has on us. Everyone has been hurt one way or the other, either slightly or deeply, some forgettable while some are not. Our deepest pains, most times, are caused by the people we trusted and loved dearly: parents, siblings, friends, spouse, etc. Some of us just won’t forgive our own selves.
Why don’t you take that great step to let go of the grudge, the pain, drop that burden of hatred, and relieve yourself with the joy of forgiveness. I know, from experience, that it may not be so easy. It is even more difficult to forget.
Forgiveness is re-acceptance. Research shows that, “people who forgive are happier and healthier than people who show resentment”. The famous advice columnist, Ann Landers said, “hate is like acid. It can damage the vessel in which it is stored as well as destroy the object on which it is poured.”
One very difficult thing to do is to always pay evil with kindness, and to forgive the seemingly unforgivable deeds. But since we wouldn’t like our “vessels” to be ruined by the acid called hate, our best option is to forgive. When we do this, life becomes so easy to live, smile becomes so easy to give, and we become truly happy – regardless of who we see or think about.
My Loud Thought with Jemima.